Purim Panic!


Recently, I’ve been writing short stories for a company called Chapter One. You can find my stories on the Chapter One website, in the Global Free Library section, which is an online collection of stories and materials that celebrate the world’s diversity.

One of the stories I wrote for Chapter One is called “Purim Panic,” and since it’s Purim, I figured it’d be a good idea to mention it.

“Purim Panic” was illustrated by the wonderful David Concepcion, and you can read it right HERE.

I’ve also made short videos for all of the Chapter One stories I’ve written. In these videos, I explain what inspired me to write the story in question. You can see the “Purim Panic” video once you scroll down after reading the story of the same name. But you can also see the “Purim Panic” video right here: 



I’m In the Weekly Humorist’s “Best of 2022” List!


Last year, I wrote a humor piece called, “Other Catchphrases John Wilkes Booth Considered Before ‘Sic Semper Tyrannis!'”

It was originally published by The Weekly Humorist in February 2022. Earlier this month, it was selected as part of The Weekly Humorist’s “Best of 2022” list!

Thanks for including me on the list, Marty Dundics and Kit Lively!

Also, thanks to my friend and fellow comedy writer Matt Cohen for helping me workshop this humor piece. 

To check out the “John Wilkes Booth” humor piece, click on THIS link and go to page two (there are two pages of content in the “Best of 2022” list).

You can also see it by clicking HERE.

Oh, and speaking of The Weekly Humorist’s annual “Best Of” lists, another one of my humor pieces, “Thanks To The Pandemic, Nobody Cares That I’m A Centaur,” was on WH’s “Best of 2021” list (which came out around this time last year). You can read that “Centaur” piece HERE.

And if you’re interested in seeing some of the humor pieces I’ve written for other publications (including Points in Case, Defenestration, The Daily Drunk, and more), just check out the “Humor, Fiction, and Essay” page on this site. 


Great Scott! The Back to the Future Little Golden Book Is Out NOW!


Hey, everybody! Happy New Year, aka Happy two days after Public Domain Day, aka Happy December 34th! (It would be December 34th, if it wasn’t for stupid January. Thanks for nothing, January!) Guess what? I have some news! 

Over the past several years, I’ve written quite a few Little Golden Books for Penguin Random House. Some of them are adaptations of famous movies. Most recently, I wrote The Back to the Future Little Golden Book, which came out today from PRH.

As you may have guessed based on the title, it’s an adaptation of the classic 1985 film Back to the Future, written as a Little Golden Book for very young readers.

Back to the Future is one of my favorite movies and I saw it SO many times when I was a kid (ask me some time about my childhood theory that the movie is a loose adaptation of The Hobbit). So it was a real thrill to write this book.

The Back to the Future Little Golden Book was illustrated by the brilliant Meg Dunn.

And much like The E.T. Little Golden Book (which I also wrote), The BTTF LGB is not just a Little Golden Book, but a Funko Pop Little Golden Book! That means that Meg Dunn drew all of the characters in the iconic, super-adorable Funko Pop style.


Check out the book’s page on the Penguin Random House site.

Check out the Amazon page for the book.

And you can buy it via the official Back to the Future site.

Find out more about some of the other books I’ve written for Penguin Random House.


Hey, I Came Up With Some Title Ideas for a Hanukkah-Themed Horror Movie


You know what? It’s Hanukkah! So I figured I’d talk about Hanukkah! No, not Hanukkah the holiday; Hanukkah the MOVIE. See, there’s a horror film that came out a few years ago called Hanukkah. It’s a slasher movie about Hanukkah, and they decided to CALL the movie Hanukkah. Which is a terrible title for a Hanukkah-themed horror movie. It’s so unimaginative! I mean, couldn’t they come up with a better title than…Hanukkah? It doesn’t even SOUND like a horror movie title.

I know that some of you reading this might be thinking, “Oh yeah, Arie? You think you can do any better? You think YOU can come up with a better title?”

And here’s my answer: Challenge accepted! I decided to come up with a list of BETTER titles for a Hanukkah-themed horror movie. I gave myself a few minutes to accomplish the task, and here are the titles I came up with:

  • Judah Maccabeast
  • Dreidel Dreidel Dreidel, I Made You Out of SLAY
  • MenoraaaaaaAAAAGGGHHH!
  • The Whining
  • Fried-Dough the 13th
  • Mr. President, Those Latkes Are Alive!
  • Gelt By Association
  • Killer Kleins from Outer Space
  • A Great Miracle Happened SCARE!
  • Macca-Beat You To Death
  • Jelly Donuts from Hell!
  • The Discount Pair of Men’s Slacks That Wouldn’t Die
  • Death Dreidels: Dreidels of Death
  • The House of Wax…Menorah Candles
  • Kvellraiser
  • Skullcaps
  • Tales from the Dark Sidelman
  • Catskills Resort Massacre
  • Menorah-morphosis
  • The Wrath of Cohen
  • Burial Plotz
  • Salem’s Latke

There. ANY of those are a better title than Hanukkah. So if you’re reading this and you’re a film producer, and you want me to write a Hanukkah-themed horror screenplay to go with any of the above titles, you know where to find me. (Um, via the “Contact” page of this website. Or just email me at arie@ariekaplan.com That’s where you can find me.)


Please contact me if you want to use this for any reason. arie@ariekaplan.com